Toxic Elephant

by Total Eclipse

Credits

  • Kronus - Code, Graphics, Music (Conversion)
  • Uruz - Music (Conversion)

Last edited on 29 May 2025 by dipswitch. See all edits

1 comment

dipswitch - 01:35 29 May 2025 #

Scrolltext:

NYYEEEAAARRRGGGHHH!!! DIS IS THE ONE AND ONLY (NO NOT CHESNEY HAWKES...) YEAH! TOTAL ECLIPSE ARE IN THE HOUSE AND AREN'T GOING BECAUSE IT'S COLD OUTSIDE AND WOULD TAKE THE +3 BELOW 5 DEGREES CENTIGRADE! $ THEN AGAIN, IT MIGHT WORK BETTER IN THE COLD AND RAIN, SO.... (SOUNDS OF MANIC PROGRAMMERS MOVING CABLES INTO A BACK GARDEN) HERE WE ARE WITH THE TOTAL ECLIPSE ROAD SHOW, FIRST STOP IS THE BACK GARDEN OF MR GARETH JAYNE!!! GUARENTEED BETTER THAN THE HOT FM (THE HOT FM IS CRAP, N'EST PA?) EXCEPT DANNY PIETRONI WHO'S PRETTY NIFTY... NJ WILLIAMS IS A POOEY! AH, THE BACK GARDEN'S OWNER IS HERE, MR JAYNE... DUMDEDUMDEDUM HELLO PEOPLES AND WELCOME TO THIS CRAPITY THING! NOPE, I AM WRONG, IT IS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD ESPECIALLY THE FIRST AND LAST PIECES THAT YOU MAY LISTEN TO! URK, THIS IS THE TEXT OF A WEIRD AMIGA PROGRAMMER! THIS IS MY THIRD ATTEMPT AT TAPPING THIS BIG SCROLL FOR MR. STEVE AS THE LAST TWO TIMES THEY WENT CORRUPT AND WE BOTH CRIED AND DRANK COFFEE! OOPS, WATCH OUT FOR MY AMIGADEMOS IF YOU HAVE AN AMIGA, IF YOU HAVE NO AMIGA THEN WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? % WHAT WAS THAT? A KR#NUS? NOPE, IT WAS A DISKETTE! I AM TAPPING, I AM TIRED! WHY TAPP I THEN??? BECAUSE I FEEL IT LIKE A GUILTY TO WRITE A BIG SCROLL FOR THIS SMALL DEMO! URK, AND THEN I MUST GO AND MAKE A VISITATION TO MY SISTER! I SHOULD BE AT SCHOOL RIGHT NOW YOU KNOW EVEN THOUGH IT IS 20.05 ON A FRIDAY! WHY IS THAT? WELL IT IS PRIZE GIVING TONITE AND I AM EXPECTED TO BE THERE AS I AM A SIXTH FORMER! UNFORTUNATELY FOR THEM THEY DECIDED NOT TO GIVE ME A PRIZE THIS YEAR SO I AM NOT GRACING THEM WITH MY WONDEROUS AND EXCLAIMABLE BEAUTY! (AHEM!) $ I AM ALSO FEELING VERY TIRED AT THIS MOMENT! I PULLED MY SHOULDER MUSCLE WHILST PUMPING IRON AT THE GYM TODAY! (URK!) I WAS LOOKING THROUGH YOUR SINCLAIR JUST THE OTHER DAY YA KNOW AND I SAW MANY THINGS THAT BOTH AMAZED AND IMPRESSED ME! MOST OF THESE THINGS THAT I SAW WERE FEMALE BUT THAT'S NOT FOR YOU TO KNOW! I AM A MUG. WHY MUG AM I THEN? BECAUSE I FELT IT LIKE A GUILTY TO WATCH OUR SIXTHFORM PLAYING RUGBY THIS AFTERNOON! THEY LOST! (YUK YUK) $ I AM GETING WORN OUT WITH ALL THIS TYPING OF SCROLLS, I STILL HAVE MANY TO TAPP IN MY OWN AMIGAPRODUCTION THAT ISN'T QUITE FINISHED! ! SO I THINK THAT IT IS TIME FOR ME TO LEAVE YOU FOR NOW AND LET MR STEVIL WEEVIL TAPP SOME MORE...... BYE WELCOME BACK, THIS IS THE TOTAL FM OUTSIDE BROADCAST AGAIN, BROADCASTING BETWEEN 20 AND 20000 HZ FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT. WE'VE GOT A GREAT CROWD HERE! (SILENCE) AH, HAHAHAHAHA! THINGS ARE GOING GREA... @1982 SINCLAIR RESEARCH LTD OOPS! LET'S PACK UP THIS OUTSIDE BROADCAST, AND GET BACK TO A COSY BEDROOM IN URBAN GLOUCESTER... (SOUNDS OF COLD WET PROGRAMMERS DRAGGING EQUIPMENT INSIDE) BETTER? YES! (YOU'VE FLIPPED!...GARPH) ME? MOI? NON, MON PETIT DEJEUNER! NEVER FELF INSANER! YEEEAAARRGGGHHH! OOO NOOO, GAR HAS GOT HOLD OF THE YS PHOTO STORY AND IS EXCLAIMING "PHWOAR" AT MARYANNE IN HER FRENCH MAID OUTFIT! OOPS, NOW HE'S TURNED OVER AND IS EXCLAIMING "PHWOAR" AT RACHEL THINGUMMY, THE WORK EXPERIENCER... SIGH! HE'S NEARLY AS BAD AS JASE (ACTUALLY, I'M NON TOO SURE...) (C'MON, I'M NOWHERE NEAR AS BAD AS JASE!...GARZPHINE) ??? I THINK.. YES, IT'S OFFICIAL! HE'S COMPLETELY FLIPPED! NO ACTUALLY, HE'S ENTITLED TO SOME SIMPLE PLEASURES, AND THIS IS OBVIOUSLY ONE OF 'EM! BEN CHISHOLME IS NEARLY AN ANAGRAM OF BENCH IS HOME! OUR SIXTH FORM IS GOOD. WE'VE GOT LOTS OF PEOPLE DOING A LEVELS, AND THEY'RE (MOSTLY) COOL. (I SOUND LIKE MARKY MARK, DON'T I?!?) THEN THERE'S THE BTEC AND CPVE GANG, WHO AREN'T AS COOL (THEY DON'T COME INTO THE COMMON ROOM, AND THEY DON'T DO A LEVELS!) AND THEY DO SILLY THINGS LIKE GET STONED (BEST NOT SAY PI...) ON SCHOOL TRIPS. AND WE'VE GOT SYD LEUILETTE, THE TEACHER WHO "KEEPS AN EYE ON US", BUT THE LEAST SAID THE BETTER! HERE'S A COLD, DAMP AMIGA PROGGER... GARFELDI JAYNE... WELL I'M PRETTY WARM AND DRY ACTUARLY! STEVE CLAIMS THAT THIS SCROLL IS LONG! WHY LONG IS IT THEN? COZ IT FEELS IT LIKE A GUILTY TO BE LONG! I WILL KEEP THIS LITTLE MESSAGE SHORT AND SWEET (A BIT LIKE A CERTAIN PART OF JASE'S ANATOMY HUR HUR!) I WOULG LIKE TO SEND THANX TO MYSELF FOR TYPING THIS SCROLL! ODD HUH! STEVE THNIKS SO BUT WHAT DO I CARE? I DUNNO, IT IS ALL FAR TOO COMPLEXLY STRUCTURED FOR ME! WELL, THAT'S IT FOR THIS ONE, I AM GOING NOW TO HAVE MY SHOULDER MASSAGED BY MY CAT (COSMO)!!! SEE YOU ALL TOMORROW (MAYBE!) BYE... BYE... FROM US BOTH! @1991 TOTAL ECLIPSE & YOUR SINCLAIR URK!   Valkommen... Dis is duh small scrollytext for Toxic Elephant. Actually, this is about the 4th time I've had to type this bleeding scroll! It's all thanks to +3 BASIC having such a dodgy editor! Cheers, Amstrad! CREDITS: Code by Steve. Graphics by Steve (except for Gar's cat, Normal). Big in Japan and Green Sunday converted from Amiga by Steve, Jobba (by Mahoney and Kaktus) and Titan (by Titan) converted from Amiga by Gar. This is STEVE tapping! }||||{ TECH INFO: There are 9.34K of Graphics, all created on The Artist II, and fonts are converted to font data on Total Eclipse's FontMake V1.0. The actual code amounts to just under 1K (including Music Replay Routines), and incorporated with the music and graphic data, # the entire demo (bar scrolltexts) comes to 23396 bytes (about 23K). The music was made on Soundtracker V1.1 and ST Compiler V1.2, and was converted from the Amiga ProTracker V1.0 MANUALLY (gasp!) thanks to Gar's Canon BJ-10e (a magnificent printer!) and it's print function. And now for the greets... Hi (especially) to Michael Thingy of Weil in Germany. Thanks for all the demos and ST & STC. The problems I had were thanks to the +3, but I can cope now. Cheers! Hi to @rjan Larsson, the best thing to come out of Sweden since the Volvo! Now the list. `Hey Yo~ to: Darren, Chris (ha! I've done it!), Percy, Keith, Dale, Jase (and his numerous other halves!) }, Jon, Pete and the rest of Yr 13 at Saintbridge (except Sandip `Interesting~ Patel)! Now, hello to the YS Crew, the JAM Crew, the MAD Crew, the Amiga Shopper Crew, Chezron, Propac, NBS, David Gommeren (aka Lord Insanity, the Speccy's greatest programmer) and The Lords, The Jokers, Mez, Hacker Chris (only joking), Mahoney and Kaktus, { Ret Traektor (?), The Silents, Crusaders, Crionics, Budbrain, Phenomena, Yankee (BIG JOKE!) [\]^ Hello to the guys that jingle our ears, namely... The KLF/The Justified Ancients of MuMu/The Timelords/The Jams (they're all the same people!), 808 State, Erasure, De La Soul, Jarre, Tangerine Dream, Kraftwerk, Abba (another joke!) No more hellos. I can't be bothered. Oh, except for all of those girls who have said that I'm cute (there are some... somewhere) because flattery gets you anywhere! %? No, no % for me, I'm always at the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm right, awful, me. Gar's %? No his % isn't, as it were, either... Horrid job, this programming lark. Doing all this work to impress people and end up without special people... Sigh. (Jon North's love life is electric compared to mine!) Let's just wait until the Xmas bash again, like last year, shall we? Yes, I think so... # Hey, people who've ordered THE MIX! from me and haven't got anything returned. I'm really sorry, my printer has had his job moved to Bristol. I will return your cash if you want me to, don't worry! But if you have the stuff needed to print THE MIX! dirt cheap, please grab me on (0452) 302579. Repeat? Well, grab a pencil and paper and wait until the end of the scroll! Okay? Right, if you've got any really good demos (not by Hacker Chris!), and by demos I mean like this (scrollies, graphics, animations, music, etc.), or if you've got a newer version of Soundtracker or ST Compiler, or if you're a graphics, sound or code wizard and would like to join Total Eclipse (we need you!), send what you can to... Steve Anderson, 108 Stanley Road, Gloucester GL1 5DH. Of course, you can write to me as well if you want a chat, or to offer me a job, or to meet me at any computer shows (female letter authors get preference, I must warn you) or anything similar, press your Multiface button and dredge the address out. My number again? (0452) 302579. And if you want to write to Gar (with or without Amiga stuff), write to my house and I'll pass it on to him! Right, I'm off to make my T. End of scroll iminent... >>>>Bye!<<<< 1991 Total Eclipse/Your Sinclair